Commitment

A pal of mine tried to introduce me to a heavily-tattooed pal of his on Friendster after I mentioned that I think ink is HOT.

Nothing much amusing about that. The thing that really REALLY tickled me was that he "warned" me beforehand that "sorry, but he's already married."

One. Whatever in Hell makes people assume that I'd wanna bang every guy whom they(NOT moi) consider "hot"?!

Two. Even funnier. What makes anyone think that the hot fella in question being married is going to deter me?! Ok, so I'm not the type to go around wreaking marriages, and sure, older guys turn me on, but I haven't scored one of my own yet, have I? Why all these baseless assumptions, guys? Come on. Please.

EDIT:Besides, married?! I think gay guys are way hotter. And seeing as gay marriage isn't allowed here... Guess I wasn't gonna be interested anyway. Gay PORNSTARS are hot, not just any gay guy. Hee.

Whoops. Time for class. Ta-ta!
MidNight

Teenage BOYS are such CHEAPstakes!

For starters, NONE of the idiots wanted to PAY subscription fees to watch the World Cup. Eventually, it was revealed that one of us had bought the subscription package. Immediately, ALL the BOYS tried to "invite" themselves over.

My friend laughed. "What? Nobody's bringing tributes?"

Their responses?
"I'll bring potato chips."
"I'll bring prawn crackers."
"I'll bring Coca-Cola."

I felt COMPELLED to speak up then. "That's it? Nobody's bringing the beer?" (I know he's a fan of Stella too, my poison of choice. We kinda agree that Tiger tastes like horse piss and Carlsberg's not quite to my taste.)

The idiots:"He SHOULD have beer at his place."

BLOODY CHEAPSTAKES! If it were me, I'd be offering, "Oh, I'll bring the WINE AND the CAVIAR."

I'm highly flattered though, when my friend turned to me and asked moi if I'd like to enjoy football matches at his place.

Unfortunately...

"Sorry, man. I'd love to, but the last time I left my prison at 4am in the morning, it was on a stretcher, into an ambulance, and straight to the hospital where I lost/wasted about 6 months of my life."

Pity.

~MidNight The Magnificent

BEST PORN EVER!

Of the few buds I have who dare to continue a conversation of the above topic(Face it, nobody BUT ME admits that they dig porn...) with me, I have concluded that gay(for me)/lesbian(for him) porn is the hottest and/or best porn there is on the Internet.

Some gay porn for my female readers...


And here's lesbian porn for my male readers...


And the awesome thing about gay/lesbian porn that appeals to us, respectively? NO NEED TO LOOK AT OTHER GIRLS' BOOBS/OTHER GUYS' DICKS. (Yuck.)

Heterosexual as we are, we only like/want to ogle at the anatomy of members of the opposite sex. Hell, if we'd wanted to examine genitals that're the same as what we have in minute detail, all we gotta do is masturbate in the shower. In front of a nice big full length mirror. So not my thing. I like dicks. Though, I'm also very thankful that I do not have one of my own.

Really BIG dicks...


I like dicks. I like to ogle pornstars'. Specifically, ridiculously well-hung pornstars'. I imagine it'll be a total pain in the ass (literally? I don't like anal either. The idea of it is repulsive.) fucking somebody that HUGE though. No, I don't need a ridiculously well-hung fuck buddy. A normal fella who knows HOW to wield his tool is WAYYY better than some dickhead with a huge dong but doesn't know HOW to use it. For now though, it's really really HOT to ogle ridiculously HUGE dicks. I so need to get my paws on a few copies of Playgirl. Or any other good gay porn magazine.

Awesome gay porn magazine...


Oh, and you KNOW you're just pissed at me because you don't get any porn. Go google it for yourself, people! (I'm trying to keep my blog somewhat clean here.)

High as fuck and horny as Hell(but not stupid enough to try and fuck any of my friends because that's just RUINING a perfectly good friendship.),
Queen MidNight