Misquotation...

Misquotation...
It's so funny to me how many MANY people live in fear of being misquoted.
The way I talk, (you know, shooting my mouth off without thinking about the string of words erupting out of my mouth...) I live in desperate fear of NOT being misquoted. (Naturally, when I'm misquoted, I can always blame whatever politically incorrect comment that was on "misquotation". Handy, no?)

Questions I'd Like Answers To...

• What offspring do pregnant pauses bear, & who's the midwife anyway?
• In a deathmatch between Superman(the Man Of Steel) & Wolverine(admantium claws), who'd come out the victor?
• If offered the choice between 2 evils, why do most people go for the lesser evil? If you're going to 'sin' anyway, might as well go all the way? Right?
• Since winnig is everything, should losing be nothing? Why do people make such a big deal out of it then?
• Between the devil & the deep blue sea, what about the devil OF the deep blue sea, Captain Davvy Jones?
• Disaster at sea: Generally, the big clamity ALWAYS has to happen in the middle of some big fancy ball, doesn't it? Shouldn't the sensible 1st thing to do be to strip out of those stuff tux/heavy gowns? Who cares about indignity in old underwear when people are dying left, right & centre?! Maybe it's just me...
• Why the expression 'dead as a dodo'? Wouldn't an expresion like, dead as a dinosaur be more macho? (Oh yeah, but then, mad scientists don't usually attempt to clone dodos back to life, so, in away, yeah, dodos ARE dead-er. Go figure.)
• Why are the nicest, kindest people said to have a heart of gold? Think about it. Gold is cold, hard & well-hidden. Maybe a heart of marshmallow?
• Would the compass needle point straight down if/when you are standing directly at the poiont of the North pole/South pole? How else would you know you've arrived, then?Why do criminal masterminds seeking minions always look fo recruits in those young offenders instituitions? The BEST don't get caught, do they?

Remember this? Haha!

The ingredients provided by Cynthia for a class short skit were:
A naughty boy is sent home from school
A door-to-door salesman is selling vaccum cleaners
A boy & a girl fall in love

Geniuses that we were, I wisely attempted to combine ALL the elements into 1 script forcing my poor unfortunate group mates into all sorts of embarrassing roles.

Here goes...

Scene 1: School, Principal's Office
Ah Boy is sent to the principal's office. Again.

Principal: You again?! This is the 5th time this school week! (quiet) Thank God this week's over.
(reading along as she writes)'Dear Mrs Ah, I regret to inform you that your son, Ah Boy has set yet another female toilet on fire while hiding in there to smoke. Yours sincerely, Mrs Caroling Tan.'
Hey, Boy, give this to your mother.

Ah Boy: Ok. Whatever. *rolls eyes*
(quiet)Who cares?!

Scene 2: Home, Living Room

Ah Boy walks in & tosses letter at Mother.

Mother: What?! Another letter?! *rips letter open and scans contents*
Dear, look at this, another letter! Can you please help to control your son? *waves letter under Father's nose*

Father: Son, listen to your mother.

Mother: Exactly. Why can't you be more like your sister?!
*gestures at Sister, who's reading an Add Maths textbook*
You stupid useless boy!
*slaps Ah Boy in slow-mo*

*Ah Boy “spins” away to land slumped against the door*

*Salesman knocks on the door & slams door open*

Salesman: Vacuum cleaners for sale! Highly efficient, sucks up ANYTH... *trails off with a lovelorn expression as he spots Sister*

Radio comes to life & starts singing “Come What May”

*Salesman & Sister waltz around the room*

The End

Thank you & please, hold the applause.